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Anxiety comes about when people obsess on “what if?” They start visualizing danger where there isn’t any, and then let their minds go wild with their imagined dangerous situation. Often the anxiety comes from fear of social situations, such as “what if someone looks at me wrong? What if they don’t like me, what if

So many of our clients come in with depression, that it is among the top three problems that we see. Relationship issues and anxiety are the other two. Depression comes and goes for most people, and often is connected to life situations. If you are feeling depressed because you can’t pay your bills, and you

One of the problems that interferes with effective change and successful counseling is a willingness to look at your own problems, rather than blaming others. I do a great deal of couples counseling, and when both couples come in ready to look at themselves, and make changes, then the therapy is almost always successful, and

Last year I posted regular updates, all the way through to Halloween. Then I got hit with the procrastination bug. I was busy with holidays but promised to get start again tomorrow. One tomorrow led into another, and another, until it was not only a new year, but a new summer. I have a to-do

Halloween can be a really special time for you to spend with your children. I remember with fond memories some of the impossible costumes my father made for me and my sister. We never had a store-bought costume, and often spent weeks working with my father in deciding on a costume and building it. My

Interaction between couples is what I refer to as the dance. The details of the fight are the music. The body language and unspoken conversation is the dance. Couples want to discuss the music and the conversation sounds like this: He likes jazz, I can’t stand jazz, I want to listen to country music instead.

No relationship can work if partners are disrespecting each other. This shows in body language when a couple comes in with their arms crossed – forming a barrier against their partner, and a refusal to make eye-contact. In a good relationship, when I talk to one partner, the other one listens respectfully, and may even

People with anger issues are generally angry with the world. They are just as likely to get angry with a stranger in public as they are with a family member or friend. They walk around with a belief that the world should know and follow their inner rules. They often describe themselves as having a

Anger is another normal emotion that everyone experiences throughout their lives. It is only bad if you use it in a way that hurts yourself or others. Anger can be an excellent emotion in that it gives us focus, strength and energy. Many people join causes or become more productive in some way when they

Anxiety is caused by your thoughts. It’s an interesting conundrum that your mind controls your brain, and your brain controls your mind. Still, it comes down to you having a choice and control over your own mind and thoughts. The most common way people give themselves anxiety (yes, you give it to yourself, it doesn’t